February 13, 2025
Don’t Be a Poop: Practice Radical Self-Acceptance Instead
This week, I was reflecting while taking a nice long walk. During my reflection, I began putting together a message for my younger self. And this is what I came up with.
Don’t be a P.O.O.P. because you will feel, well, pooped.
And you may not feel just pooped; you may become incredibly exhausted, unhappy, and frustrated.
You may be wondering, what did I mean by being a P.O.O.P?
People Pleasing Overachieving Overwhelmed/Overworking Perfectionist
Okay, technically it would spell P.P.O.O.O.P, but it sounds the same.
I was a P.O.O.P. in fact, I am still a recovering P.O.O.P. A work in progress.
It didn’t have to be that way. I could have practiced radical self-acceptance as a younger me. Things may have turned out very differently. I may not have struggled with burnout or have created my own glass ceiling.
Perhaps I may have been happier, more fulfilled, and laughed more.
But the truth is that I carried a lot of crap with me from my childhood. Let’s face it: we all do, to some extent. Even in the most loving, safe family environments, shit happens.
So where did this come from, and how would radical self-acceptance have made a difference in my life?
- People Pleasing: Requiring recognition and acceptance by others to feel seen, loved, and valued.
- Overachieving: Believing that if you are just “good enough” it will make things okay, safer, and better – while seeking recognition and acceptance.
- Overwhelmed and Overworked: If you practice a workaholic mentality, and keep moving; you do not have to deal with your emotions. You take on more than you should to be accepted and recognized.
- Perfectionist: You attempt to make things perfect and try to maintain control in the face of chaos. Keeping it safe. Being good enough to seek to feel accepted, loved, and recognized.
You may have noticed a pattern here. Obviously, I have had a few issues.
My younger self did not accept herself. She was always looking for external validation and appreciation. Such as being accepted by the executives and being a part of the senior “club.”
It took until I was in my early forties to learn that I simply needed my own acknowledgment and approval to be happy. I didn’t need external praise to feel valued and positive about myself. I just needed to accept and approve of myself.
I needed to love myself. Oh, how I wish I had learned that much earlier in life.
If I had embraced the concept of radical self-acceptance earlier, I would have been much more fulfilled and I would have experienced more daily joy.
I would have worn whatever I wanted to work and not worried so much about what the senior executives thought of me.
I wouldn’t have been such a P.O.O.P.
Radical self-acceptance is fully supporting and adopting all that you are. It’s accepting your shiny parts, and shadow side. Your areas of expertise, and opportunities for growth.
It is the ability to evolve and accept your successes and your mistakes.
You compassionately assess yourself and stay open to learning. Love yourself and all that you bring to the world. Care for yourself and give yourself grace. Stay positive and squash that critical, negative self-talk when it pops into your head.
That list may sound easy, but it is hard to practice.
The noise and negative old stories we carry get in the way.
They creep in and make us question ourselves. Our ability to evaluate ourselves, and how we assess ourselves. They make us question our right to joy, happiness, and success.
But that is why it is called practice.
It takes a daily commitment to be there for ourselves. Learning how to be intentional, caring, loving, and accepting takes time.
This is how I try to come to the world today. Valuing myself. Caring for myself. Believing in myself. I still struggle. I don’t have it all figured out yet. But I am not being a P.O.O.P these days.
Well, most days, at least.
Try practicing radical self-acceptance. You’ve got this. Don’t forget that you are more powerful than you know. Stronger than you give yourself credit for. And filled with endless possibilities. Embrace yourself, yes, all of you. You will be glad you did.
Love and Light,
Jackie
